Husbands Love Your Wives

I am writing this blog in honor of Father’s Day.

Fathers – the best thing you can do for your kids is to give your life to Christ, but the next best thing you can do is to love your wife and maintain a healthy marriage.

It’s clear. The current culture has an agenda to disrupt what they call the nuclear family, however, the nuclear family is God’s idea.

“So God created human beings in His own image.  In the image of God, He created them; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and said, “Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth.” Genesis 1:28-28

The culture is confused about what a family is, but God is not confused. God defines a family as a man, a woman, and children. The best thing I can do to counter the confusion in the culture is to set an example of what a healthy marriage looks like.

In the beginning, when God created marriage, He had an idea of what a healthy marriage is. If we do things God’s way, then our marriage works and that is what is best for my kids and grandkids.

“Children who grow up in married, two-parent families, have two to three times more positive life outcomes than those who do not.” – Brad Wilcox

“The overwhelming verdict is that being married and growing up with parents who are married are enormous boosts to our well-being.” – Tim Keller

How do I make my marriage work? I choose to look to the scriptures and follow God’s instructions.

“Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it.” – Ephesians 5:25

Here is a list of 5 things I choose to do to follow Jesus’ example.

1. I give my life to my wife. I grew up in a family where my father was married and divorced three times. Every time he went through a divorce, I went through a divorce. I experienced firsthand the pain that children experience with divorce. When Deb and I got married, we both agreed that divorce was not an option. When you are committed to your spouse for life it creates a safe space for your kids.

• I serve my wife. Jesus came to the earth to serve, not to be served. This means that I put my spouse before myself in the big things and the little things. When your kids see you and your spouse serving one another, they will follow your example. Debbie loves to cook and to bake, but every once in a while I get to cook for her. I can cook two things, hamburgers on the grill and eggs for breakfast. Most mornings I will ask, do you want me to cook you an egg? I like it when she says “yes,” because I get to serve her.

• I am a team player. One of the first things Jesus did was the build a team. He didn’t do everything by himself. In a healthy marriage, both partners function as a team helping each other with chores and responsibilities. This is a great example for your kids.

• I listen to my wife. Jesus said, “Ask and you shall receive that your joy may be full.” Jesus listens to us when we pray and it brings him joy to respond to our requests. Deb thinks differently than I do, and she has a different perspective. To be transparent, the biggest mistakes I have made in life were times I didn’t listen to Deb.

• I use my words to build up my wife. “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.” -Ephesians 4:29

One of the most challenging things for kids is when they see two people they love and respect fighting with each other. It’s damaging. Choose to use your words to build up your spouse and they in turn will build you up.

Do I always do these five things? No, sometimes I fail, but then I get up, ask Deb to forgive me, and keep loving my wife. Debbie and I will be married for 41 years this July, and we continue to grow in all of these areas.

New Monday With Mark on this topic, click the image below to watch on YouTube now!