Boundaries in Ministry

Without question, the biggest challenge in ministry is creating healthy boundaries. Church, spouse, children, job, and friends all seem to blend together.

“A boundary defines where you end and someone else begins.”

Ask yourself these questions:

• Do you have trouble saying no?
• Do you have a regular day off?
• Do you get angry when other people tell you no?

The most basic boundary word is the word “No”. The demands of ministry are never-ending. If you are going to be in the race for the long haul, you need to know how and when to say no.

When I first started in ministry, I did not know how to say no. I was working every day and putting in seventy hours per week. I was telling myself that I was working for the Lord so it was okay.

Let’s think about that idea for a minute. Does God really want me working seventy hours per week? Wasn’t He the One who created the concept of a day off every week?

The truth is that if you establish healthy boundaries in your ministry, you will reach more people and enjoy your life more.

Here are some tips for creating healthy boundaries in ministry:

1. Fight for your day off.
   Establish at least one day every week for you and your family. Do not go to church on this day. Do not read your e-mails. Do not think about work. Have some fun!
2. Listen to your spouse.
   Debbie and I have always been a ministry team. This has its advantages and disadvantages. One of the disadvantages is that we are always talking about the ministry. We have this agreement that if one of us says, “I don’t want to talk about ministry right now,” then we change the subject.
3. Create a not-to-do list on a weekly basis.
   When you write out your to-do list, also create a not-to-do list. If you going to do something new, you will have to give up something you are currently doing.
4. Learn how to say no to your boss.
   I had a really hard time saying no to my pastor because I wanted to please him. I think most of us feel this way. So if my pastor asked me to do something new and I had the time to do it, I would say yes.

If it made me feel overwhelmed, I would respond by saying something like, “This week I am working on project A. I can take on the new project, but I will have to put off project A. Which one do you want me to work on?”

This is much better than saying, “No, I don’t have the time,” because it gives my pastor the steering wheel. If my pastor wants me to change course and work on something new, it’s no sweat off of my nose, because I serve him. Ministry is a marathon, not a sprint. Keep running your race.

If you are constantly feeling overwhelmed, it may mean it’s time to create some boundaries.

I’d love to know what your boundaries are? What are your absolutes?